I'm a Soccer Mom

I'm a soccer mom and I'm proud of it. Every weekend I brave the Northwest Oklahoma wind, dust, heat, cold, or rain and camp out at the soccer fields cheering on my kids and their teams. If you need sunscreen, insect repellent, water, a snack, a cooler, an umbrella, band aids, a sweatshirt, a blanket, or an inhaler...I can hook you up. Soccer moms rival the boy scouts for preparedness and we are always willing to lend a hand (or a sunvisor).
I may not know much about soccer, but I'm learning. Five years ago I didn't know ANYTHING about soccer and sometimes I marvel at how far I've come. I know if a throw in is legal or not, what position each kid is on the field and if he's covering that position well. Maybe most importantly, I'm fluent in soccer lingo such as "big foot" (forceful kick, also known as "thunder foot"), "attacker" (any kid on the team that has the ball), "chest trap" (when a kid uses his chest on purpose to stop a ball), "dribbling" (moving the ball with your feet in a controlled fashion), "hand ball" (when a player who is not a goalie touches the ball with his hand; this is BAD), and all manner of foreign sounding terms and phrases. I can shout helpful advice (but only at my child, because I'm not THAT kind of soccer mom) to players on the field and off (such as, "honey, don't drink the WHOLE Gatorade...). If pressed, I can even go so far as to run drills with the kids in the yard or if coach can't make it to practice.
I love soaking up the sun (not so much the rain) and watching my kiddos have a great time playing soccer. They may never go to college on a soccer scholarship, or even be the star of their team, but they are learning valuable lessons about life: hard work, dedication, teamwork, determination, play hard, play fair, have fun. These are things that can't be taught playing video games from the recliner.
If, as Sarah Palin says, the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is lipstick...what is the difference between a soccer mom and a pit bull? A whole lot of things, that's what!